Rosas
by Hades'Queen
Summary: READ, PLEASE! Tonks think back to the past as she comes across a familiar face in the order of the Phoenix. ONE-SHOT


**Disclaimer: **Characters belong to J. K. Rowling.

**A/N: **Well a song in Spanish by a band called "La oreja De Van Gogh" inspires this fic. The song is called "Rosas" and since it inspired the fic it will be added to the story. The story takes place at the end of The Goblet of Fire, when The Order of The Phoenix gets together for the first time.

**Summary: **Tonks thinks back to the past as she comes across a familiar face in the Order of the Phoenix. One-shot.

**  
"Rosas"**

Tonks slowly opened her eyes and got out of bed. She threw off the purple sheets and covers and got out of bed. She slowly walked over to the mirror and stared into it. She was now twenty-eight years old and she still looked like she was twenty. She stared as her blondish-brown hair, which went down halfway down her back. It wasn't exactly straight, but it wasn't too wavy either.

She stared at her light blue eyes, her thin pink lips, her small nose and thin black brows. They went well with her heart-shaped face, but she didn't like it. Yes she looked pretty, but she wasn't one for looking pretty. Tonks yawned and stretched. She wanted to change her appearance, but she figured that for the first meeting she would go as herself. After the first meeting she would go however it was that she wished to go. She turned away from the mirror and preceded to change, she threw on a black Weird Sisters t-shirt and some jeans. She then proceeded to put on her black military boots.

_En un dia de estos en que suelo pensar_

_Hoy va a ser el dia menos pensado"_

_Nos hemos cruzado, has decidido mirar,_

_A los ojitos azules que ahora van a tu lado_

She was soon standing on the sidewalk before where Number 12 Grimmauld place would soon be. She looked around at the neighborhood as so many memories came running back to her. It had been a very long time since she had last been there, the old house stood for everything she hated. It saddened her to say, but she truly did hate Sirius' mother, the old hag. She stood there for a couple of moments and took in a deep breath, she knew that she was much too early, but Sirius had invited her to come. She knew that it was going to be a long and unexpected day.

"Nymphadora," Tonks shivered at the sound of her first name and the sound of a familiar voice that she had not heard in such a very long time. A voice she knew would forever stay in her heart. She closed her eyes and slowly turned around. She slowly opened her eyes and allowed them to move up towards the man who stood about five feet before her.

_Desde el momento en el que te conoci_

_Resumiendo con prisas Tiempo de Silencio_

_Te juro que a nadie le he vuelto a decir_

_Que tenemos el record del mundo en querermos _

Tonks mind reeled back to when she was nine years old, in the summertime. Sirius had been sixteen years old at the time; he had come over with one of his closest friends to visit her mother. That was the first time in which she had met Remus, though she had only glimpsed him. She had many times before seen James, James treated her like she was his little sister, but it had been completely different when she met Remus. She didn't know why, but ever since than she felt something different for him. She was too shy at that time to say anything at all to him so she didn't.

The next time that Tonks saw Remus was when she was thirteen years old. She had gone to the Funeral of Lily and James and she saw him there. She was not only mourning the loss of James but the loss of Sirius as well, for after all he was in Azkaban blamed for a crime she refused to believe that he had committed. It had been then when she was too filled with sorrow to be aware of being shy. After that she and Remus remained pen palls for he decided to roam about the world alone and she wanted to hear all about the places that he visited.

With every letter she fell in love with him, when he finally decided that he would return, she was fifteen. When he came to find her he found that she was no longer a child and no matter how much he protested her, she knew that he too had fallen in love with her. He had been her first love, her first boyfriend. She had never cared for any of the other boys, but he was completely different. He was the only one that she had ever told that they had the entire time of the world to love each other, something she had never even felt for anyone else, not even for the ones that came after Remus.

_Por eso esperaba con la carita empapada _

_A que llegaras con rosas, con mil rosas para mi,_

_Porque ya sabes que me encantan esas cosas_

_Que no importa si es muy tonto, soy asi_

_Y aun me parece mentira que se escape mi vida_

_Imaginando que vuelves a pasarte por aqui,_

_Donde los Viernes cada tarde, como siempre,_

_La esperanza dice "quieta, hoy quizas si…"_

"Remus, what are you doing here?" she asked as she stared at him. It had been the first time she had seen him in what seemed like forever. She stared at him for a long time. His brown hair had a small amount of gray in them. His amber eyes, which she had instantly fallen in love with from the first time, which she saw them, still had their flecks of gold. His skin was as pale as ever and his overall appearance was still that of a man in his late twenties, however, the years that had passed in loneliness made him look jaded.

"I'm part of the Order," he responded as he stood there. His eyes where looking her over. From her blonde-brown hair to her blue eyes, clearly it seemed to him that she had not changed a bit. Perhaps the only change he saw in her was the fact that she did not look like the happy young woman, which he had once known.

"So am I," Tonks responded as she looked at him. He nodded and looked down at his feet. He seemed to be thinking about something in his head. Tonks turned away from him and looked around while running a hand through her hair. She felt extremely awkward standing there with the only man she had ever truly loved. So many questions where running through her head, begging to be answered. She wanted to know what he had done with his life those past nine years. She wanted to know if he still felt for her the way that she felt for him, but she knew that they where questions that she would not be able to ask herself.

As for the other things on her mind, they all had to do with the order. Had she any idea that Remus was joining, she would have tried to avoid it. She loved Remus with all her heart and her heart begged to see him, but she knew that it hurt far more to see him than to not see him at all. It hurt to see someone completely unattainable. Besides she wondered how this would affect them as Order members. What happened in the past would surely affect how they worked together.

"Nymphadora, we need to leave the past where it is," he said, as he seemed to be thinking along the same lines as she. She did not turn to look at him. She could feel her eyes watering at his request. She knew that it was what had to be done, but the fact of the matter was that it was easier said than done. Or at least for her it was, she wondered if for him it was an easy matter. Did he find it so easy to simply forget their past?

_Escapando una noche de un bostezo de sol_

_Me pediste que te diera un beso._

_Con lo baratos que salen, mi amor, _

_Que te cuesta callarme con uno de esos._

She thought back to the first time that they kissed and officially became a couple. Sure they both knew that they loved each other when she was fifteen, but at the time they felt that it was inappropriate to demonstrate their love for each other. After all she was fifteen years old at the time and he was twenty-two at the time. Fours years passed with them falling deeper for each other by the day.

On the night of her nineteenth birthday, as she lay in bed staring out the window, she felt that she could not sleep for all she could do was think about him. That night she crawled out of bed and snuck out of her room through her window, she than popped right into his living room. She found that he was sitting in an armchair reading a book, but he looked very tired. His head snapped up as he heard the loud POP. That night after spending long hours with each other merely talking, as the sun began to rise, he requested a kiss. Of course it cost her nothing at all to oblige all to willingly to his request.

_Pasaron seis meses y me dijiste adios,_

_Un placer coincidir en esta vida._

_Alli me quede, en una mano el corazon,_

_Y en la otra excusas que ni tu entendias._

Six months they spent in their bliss, but it was too good to be true. It was than that he returned her heart, and he placed it in her hand. She was left standing there with her heart in her hand with nothing but an excuse that she did not understand as to why he was leaving her behind. She wondered if perhaps he even understood it. What did what other people thought of them matter anymore? They where both consenting adults, what others said no longer mattered, besides Remus was not one to care what others said or thought. She did not understand it than and she had yet to understand it.

Tonks blinked hard, never wanting him to see a single tear. She turned her watery blue gaze to him, she felt as though an entire eternity had passed between them. The silence that was spread between them after his last statement was quite lengthy and painful to withstand, but she could find no words to voice her opinion on the matter, she was not even sure what it was that she wanted to voice.

She did not wish to divulge to him that she still loved him, but she knew that he could clearly already see that. She was unable to leave the past where it was. Every second in his presence she could feel that she was reliving it. She was unsure of what the future was holding out to her. Sure for him it was perhaps easy to say to leave the past where it is, but it was not so easy for her. And if that was what he felt than she wanted nothing more to say to him.

"Well than I have nothing to say to you," she said as she turned away and started on the path towards Number 12 Grimmauld Place. As she neared the building started to emerge from between number eleven and thirteen, pushing the others to the side. She walked swiftly away, but she heard Remus' hurried steps coming after her as tough he wished to say more to her. She soon opened the door as quickly as possible and heard him walking in behind her.

_Por eso esperaba con la carita empapada _

_A que llegaras con rosas, con mil rosas para mi,_

_Porque ya sabes que me encantan esas cosas_

_Que no importa si es muy tonto, soy asi_

_Y aun me parece mentira que se escape mi vida_

_Imaginando que vuelves a pasarte por aqui,_

_Donde los Viernes cada tarde, como siempre,_

_La esperanza dice "quieta, hoy quizas si…"_

"Nymph, that isn't what I meant," he said softly as he reached out for her arm as they stood outside the door of Grimmauld. She turned around and snatched her hand out of his grasp, her eyes where steadily gathering more tears and the damn threatened to break loose. She took in a deep calming breath and closed her eyes. When she opened them she could see that Remus was looking upon her with a look of empathy.

"That's the way you want it that is how it will be," Tonks said and she than turned away and immediately tapped her wand on the door. She could hear what sounded like loud metal locks turning and clicking and it soon opened and she stepped inside.

As she stood inside the dark, dimly lit entrance hall of Number 12 Grimmauld Place she could feel her recurring dream spring to life. She stood in the rain, getting drenched from head to toe. Standing in the rain on a windy night waiting for Remus to bring her roses. She loved roses, and he knew that. She didn't care if it was something silly; it was just the way she was. Of course in her dream she did nothing but wait for a phantom. For she would see him coming over to her in the dark, but as he came closer she realized it was nothing but her imagination, he was never really there. It seemed that it was every Friday she would stand there, a voice in the wind telling her 'don't worry, perhaps today…' It seemed to her that she had wasted her life dreaming of this day and night.

"Remus, Tonks!" Sirius said as he walked over to them in a low whisper. He hugged both of them, but neither Tonks nor Remus said anything. He gave them a strange look, but said nothing. Together all three of them made their way down the stairs and into the kitchen of Number Twelve Grimmauld place. She soon found that Sirius was not alone. Bill, Charlie and Mrs. Weasley were all sitting at the kitchen table.

"Tonks! Imagine seeing you here!" Charlie Weasley said as he looked up at her and offered her a big smile. Tonks soon turned her gaze to Bill who was staring down at his cup of tea; there was a melancholy smile on his face. Tonks soon turned her face towards Mrs. Weasley who was walking over to her.

"Hey Mrs. Weasley," she said as she was hugged by her. Mrs. Weasley smiled warmly at her and let go, stepping back.

_Y es que empiezo a pensar_

_Que el amor verdadero es tan solo el primero,_

_Y es que empiezo a sospechar _

_Que los demas son solo para olvidar_

Tonks soon turned her gaze to Bill who was now slowly standing up. She saw Remus walk past her and greet Mrs. Weasley and Charlie. He took a seat and stared at her as Bill walked over to her, very slowly. Bill was wearing black pants and a black, long sleeved shirt, which seemed to cling to his broad shoulders and thin, but well shaped upper body. His long red hair was held back in a ponytail and a fang earring clung from his ear. He was quite tall, as he came nearer.

"Hey Nymph," he said as he wrapped his arms around her. She wrapped her arms around his neck and closed her eyes. She was aware that a look of shock had come over Remus' face as he watched her interaction with Bill. After all she allowed no one, except someone she really, really loved in a special way call her Nymph. And it was true; Bill was someone special to her.

Bill had been her long time friend from the time they met in the Hogwarts express in their first year, until she was 23. After her twenty-first birthday they had become more than friends. You see she had always known that Bill loved her in more than a just friends kind of way and she loved him, just not to the extent that he loved her. When she turned 23 they had a clean break, they promised that they would still be friends, even though they where not together. The reason they broke up was because she wanted to. She explained to him that she loved him, but she would never love him to the extent of which he loved her and she wanted it to end before it got nasty.

Bill agreed and that marked the end. After all Bill had always known that she loved someone else, though, he knew not who. Bill had loved her the way that she loved Remus. Their first love, which meant it was the only one that mattered. Tonks had begun to feel that the first love was the only one that ever really mattered and that all the other ones where simply to be able to forget the first.

They soon pulled away from each other and looked into each other's eyes. "How have you been?" he asked her softly as he looked down at her. She could feel as Sirius walked past her and to sit next to Remus. She could hear in the background Sirius asking Mrs. Weasley and Charlie how they knew each other and Mrs. Weasley explaining their tragic Love story to Sirius and Remus. No one knew about the tragic love story between Remus and Tonks.

"Okay, you?" she responded softly a she smiled up at him.

"I've been well, I've got a girlfriend now. Her name is Fleur, she's great," he said as he looked down at her. He said it softly; it wasn't something he said to injure her, merely something to assure her that he was doing better. She smiled up at him, she was truly, genuinely happy for him. She never wanted him to suffer for her. She wanted him to be able to receive the love that he so deserved.

"That's great Bill," she said as she could feel her eyes water and a tear finally escaped from her eye. He furrowed his brow at this and wiped the tear from her face ever so tenderly. She was glad that Bill covered her from everyone else's view. He was the only one she ever felt comfortable revealing her tears too. She was too proud to show them to Remus.

"You still suffer for-" he started out asking her in a low whisper but she raised her hand and softly placed it over his lips. She nodded in response to his question as another tear came down. He once more reached down and wiped it away. She could still hear Remus, Sirius and Mrs. Weasley speaking to each other and she knew that they where not being listened to. She knew that perhaps Remus was watching them, but she knew that he could not hear them.

"It's Remus," Tonks mouthed to Bill. She felt that she had to tell somebody and after all Bill had always been someone that she could count on. He looked genuinely astounded by this, but knew better than to turn around and gape at him. Tonks closed her eyes tightly and willed the tears away. She soon felt Bill's arms enclose around her and she pressed her head against his chest. She felt his hand running over her head trying to console her and he whispered to her that everything would be all right. She felt safe there. She stood there a long moment and soon stepped out of his embrace. She smiled up at him. "Thank you," she mouthed to him. He merely smiled down at her. She spent the entire day there, it was long, but she spent it with Bill. When the meeting was over she was soon leaving.

"Tonks aren't you staying a while?" Sirius asked when he saw that she was nearing the end of the kitchen. Remus was standing next to him at the time, staring down at his feet as though they where so very interesting.

"No, I need to spend some time alone," she said as she stuck a strand of blonde hair behind her ear. She merely turned away and started on her way up the stairs. She was soon standing outside of Number 12 Grimmauld Place; she decided that she would walk to her mothers home. It was somewhat a sort of safe haven for her. It was late and very quiet out. She could tell it was the kind of quite just before a storm. It soon started to rain, but very softly. By the time that she neared home she was drenched.

_Por eso esperaba con la carita empapada _

_A que llegaras con Rosas, con mil Rosas para mi,_

_Porque ya sabes que me encantan esas cosas_

_Que no importa si es muy tonto, soy asi_

_Y aun me parece mentira que se escape mi vida_

_Imaginando que vuelves a pasarte por aqui,_

_Donde los Viernes cada tarde, como siempre,_

_La esperanza dice "quieta, hoy quizas si…"_

As she neared the front steps she could see a figure sitting on the front steps of her house drenched in water. She squinted her eyes in the dark, to see who it was, and as she neared she realized that it was Remus. She made her way up the steps and stood before him. "What are you doing here?" she asked as she looked up at him. He continued to look into her eyes.

"I thought that you would come here, you always do when you want to be alone," he said to her as he looked at her. She shook her head at this; she was surprised that he still knew her so very well. She looked up into his eyes as he continued to speak. "No one is home, like always and I wanted to talk to you."

"What more could you possibly have to say?" she asked as she looked into his eyes and pushed the wet hair out of her face.

"Something so simple which this stands for," he said as he held out a perfect red rose to her. She stared at the red rose that he was holding out to her. It was very perfect and beautiful. She thought of the meaning of the rose, roses represented love. She looked up into his eyes with a questioning and searching gaze; was he saying that he still loved her? She shook her head and held her head in her hands. She couldn't believe it.

"This isn't real," she said while shaking her head, "its just another dream." She walked inside and closed the door. She leaned against the door and shook her head. She was completely convinced that it was a dream. She slowly opened her eyes and switched on the lights and her eyes widened in surprised as she looked at the living room. The entire room was filled with vases with long stemmed roses. They where about what seemed to be two hundred roses there. All the roses were shades of blue and light purple. She walked over to the nearest vase and found that they where real, that they were truly there and were not a figment of her imagination.

Tonks walked over to the door and opened it to see if Remus was still there but he was no longer there. She closed the door and looked and walked over to the closest vase of roses where she found there was a card. '_I know you think I don't mean that I love you, but go up to your bedroom' _The note read. She put the card down and slowly walked over to the stairs. She looked up and found that every single step was covered with pink rose petals. There where so many rose petals that you couldn't see the white carpet beneath them. She picked up the single black rose at the base of the stairs and made her way up the stairs.

When she reached the second landing, she found that the entire hallway was filled with yellow roses. There where so many vases lining each of the walls with long stem, yellow roses. She thought there were perhaps a hundred roses there. She walked down the hall to the end of the hall where she found that her room door was partly open. She stepped into her room and found that it was lit by many candles, which hovered in the air, very much like the ones in the Great Hall at Hogwarts.

The entire floor and her bed were covered in red rose petals. On the center of her bed was a shape of a heart created by white rose petals. Once more the entire four walls where lined with vases filled of long-stemmed red roses. She could feel tears building in her eyes; it was entirely much too beautiful. "A million roses went into the making of this," she heard him say from behind. She jumped and turned around to look at him. The tear escaped from its confines, it was much stronger than her pride. He held out the single white rose once more to her. "If that does not show how much I love you, I do not know what will." She merely threw her arms around him and cried tears of joy into his shoulder. After a minute he pulled away and wiped her tears away and placed a tender kiss on her lips. "You are the white rose, pure and lovely. I am the black rose, dark and gloomy. We belong in a blend of gray," he said as he grabbed the two roses and they merged together creating a single gray rose.

_**THE END**_


End file.
